4 Ways to Navigate Perimenopause And Reclaim Your Body

When your clothes stop fitting, it’s not just about size; it’s about identity, self-doubt, and silent grief no one prepared us for.

I shared this recently on social media, and the responses have never felt so personal or been so emotional.

When your clothes stop fitting, it’s not just about the size.
It’s about how quickly your confidence unravels.
It’s about the grief that comes from realizing you don’t feel comfortable in your own skin anymore, and the confusion of not knowing how to get back there.

The hardest part isn’t the weight gain. It’s the self-doubt that comes with it.
You start blaming yourself.
You wonder if you’ve let yourself go.
You question whether you’re disciplined enough or trying hard enough, when in reality, your body is going through something massive that no one prepared you for.

You keep showing up. You power through.
You try to outsmart your body with stricter routines and smaller portions, but it feels like you’re losing a fight you never agreed to.
And through all of it, you’re expected to smile. To perform. To keep acting like nothing is changing.

But everything is changing.

I remember standing in front of my mirror in my mid-40s and thinking, “Whose body is that?”
I hadn’t changed my habits. I wasn’t doing anything differently. But suddenly, I didn’t recognize myself.
And I didn’t have the language yet to explain it.
I didn’t even know the word “perimenopause.” I was living in a new body with old information in my head.

In my book, How to Menopause, I wrote about taking charge of your health due to the silent unraveling that happens to so many of us, not because we’re weak, but because we were never given the playbook.

I mean, imagine this. One day, out of nowhere, our estrogen drops and our cortisol rises. The sleep simply falls apart. Our metabolism slows down, and did I mention fat starts redistributing, especially around the midsection? And through it all, we’re told to just “eat better” or “get more exercise.”

I did all the things. I tried harder. Ate less. Worked out more. Nothing moved.
Because what I needed wasn’t more discipline, I needed more information and maybe more compassion.

4 Ways to Navigate Perimenopause And Reclaim Your Body

Here’s what I’ve learned and what has actually helped:

1. I started eating more protein.

Yes, more. Not less.
Protein became a non-negotiable. I aim for 30 grams per meal when I can. It helps me stay full, it supports muscle, and it gives me steady energy instead of crashing mid-day. It’s not about perfection. It’s about fuel.

2. I traded obsessive cardio for strength training.

I used to believe running longer was the answer. But lifting weights is what finally helped me feel strong again. Strength training gave me something the scale never could: confidence that came from the inside out.

3. I talked to my doctor about hormone therapy (even when I was afraid of it originally)

That conversation changed everything. I didn’t go in asking for a magic fix. I went in asking to understand what was happening to my body.
For me, hormone therapy became part of my solution. It might not be the answer for everyone, but every woman deserves the choice and the facts to make that decision.

4. I stopped trying to be 25.

I let go of the pressure to “bounce back.” I stopped comparing myself to an old version of me that no longer fits who I am or what I need.
This version of me? She lifts heavier. She eats better. She sleeps more. She’s less interested in being small and more interested in feeling powerful.

That’s the win.

If you’re standing in front of the mirror right now wondering what’s happening, please know this: you are not broken. You are not doing anything wrong.

Your body is wise. It’s just asking you to listen.

This is not about giving up. This is about showing up for your future self and for a version of you who no longer wants to suffer in silence.

You’re not alone in this. Not even close. And you’re not invisible. You’re in the middle of becoming something stronger than before. You don’t need to outsmart your body. You just need to understand it. And trust that it’s working for you even now.